Definition Paper- Reflection

         Definition writing is a method that people see everyday, and Ms. Basko defined it as “a method of development in which the writer clarifies the meaning of a term to support a point.”  We read a short piece called “The Wife-Beater” by Gayle Rosenwald Smith, which defined a type of clothing, and I picked up on many different strategies used in this piece, such as compare/contrast, dictionary definition, description, and surface meaning.

         I wanted to write about a unique topic for this paper, and chose a clothing “accessory” instead of an actual piece of clothing.  I thought that it would be interesting to learn about where the sequin came from and how it is being used in the fashion world.

         This paper was very easy to write because the research that I was doing about the topic was very interesting.  All of the facts and history that I was gathering about the sequin made my paper flow really nicely and have a solid structure.  I think the best parts of my first draft were the history of the sequin, the dictionary definition, and the overall organization of the paper.  I opened with places that sequins can be found, went into the history of the sequin, added a dictionary definition, and then talked about future possibilities.

         I kept this same structure throughout the editing process on the way to my final draft, but the peer feedback session helped me to add more to my paper.  Under the “other techniques” section on the feedback sheet, people wrote that I could have included my own opinion about sequins, as well as some modern fashion examples that could be used to make connections.  I added both my opinion and modern information to the last paragraph, and I think that it added more depth to the paper.

         Looking through papers written by my peers, I noticed that some people used pictures to convey their topic.  I wanted to add this strategy to my paper so that it would give readers a visual to go along with the description. 

         Lastly, I looked over the “Essay Titles” paper that Ms. Basko gave us, and wanted to make my title more eye-catching.  I changed the original, The Sequin, to “Sequins in the Spotlight.”  I thought that this title would draw more people in to the paper.

         I hope that after reading this paper, readers will be more educated on the history of the sequin and how it is used in the modern fashion world.  This paper has introduced me to a wider range of strategies that I can apply to any definition paper that I write in the future.

Definition Paper- Revised

Sequins in the Spotlight

            They can be found everywhere and serve many different purposes.  From embellishing the ruby slippers that Judy Garland wore in the Wizard of Oz, to being worn in many cultures to distract and deflect evil spirits, sequins are a very popular accessory.

            Sequins have been around for centuries, dating back to Ancient Egypt and Ancient Greece.  We usually think of sequins as pieces of shiny plastic, but they were originally made of coins.  Tiny holes were drilled into the coins and they were attached to clothing.  Archaeologists have even found mummified pharaohs wrapped in sequined cloth.  Gypsies brought sequins over to Europe, often wearing coins sewn on their clothing.  The “purpose” of wearing these sequins was to demonstrate wealth and power.

            The Funk and Wagnalls Standard College Dictionary defines the term sequin as:

1.    A small coinlike ornament sewn on clothing

2.    An obsolete gold coin of the Venetian republic, later introduced into Turkey: also called zecchino

            The word “sequin” can be traced to the Arabic word “sikka,” meaning coin. “Sikkas” were used for centuries to decorate clothing throughout the Middle East and Mediterranean.  In Venice, Italy during the thirteenth century, people produced coins called “zecchinos” to embellish clothing.  The French adapted this word to “sequin,” which we now use today.

            Sequins have become very popular on all types of clothing and accessories, including wedding dresses, prom dresses, purses, and even on shoes.  I had sequins on almost every one of my dance costumes and also on clothes when I was younger.  Sometimes, though, fashion designers can go overboard with sequins and make outfits look very cheap, but overall, sequins really help to brighten up an outfit and give it a pretty glow or sparkle..  Sequins have not gone out of style and will definitely continue to be used in the future.

           

Definition Paper

The Sequin

           They can be found everywhere and serve many different purposes.  From embellishing the ruby slippers that Judy Garland wore in the Wizard of Oz, to being worn in many cultures to distract and deflect evil spirits, sequins are a very popular accessory.

            Sequins have been around for centuries, dating back to Ancient Egypt and Ancient Greece.  We usually think of sequins as pieces of shiny plastic, but they were originally made of coins.  Tiny holes were drilled into the coins and they were attached to clothing.  Archaeologists have even found mummified pharaohs wrapped in sequined cloth.  Gypsies brought sequins over to Europe, often wearing coins sewn on their clothing.  The “purpose” of wearing these sequins was to demonstrate wealth and power.

            The Funk and Wagnalls Standard College Dictionary defines the term sequin as:

1. A small coinlike ornament sewn on clothing
2. An obsolete gold coin of the Venetian republic, later introduced into Turkey: also called zecchino

            The word “sequin” can be traced to the Arabic word “sikka,” meaning coin. “Sikkas” were used for centuries to decorate clothing throughout the Middle East and Mediterranean.  In Venice, Italy during the thirteenth century, people produced coins called “zecchinos” to embellish clothing.  The French adapted this word to “sequin,” which we now use today.
            Sequins are very popular in the fashion world, and will definitely continue to be used into the future.

Topic Proposal for Essay

1.       Title: Go Green

2.       Topic: Environmental problems

3.       Personal Connections: I’m interested in this topic because I want to help protect the environment and find ways to reduce pollution.

4.       Audience: This is an important topic in the world today, and other people interested in helping the environment might find it very interesting. 

5.       Purpose: After someone reads my essay, I want them to be informed of the harm caused to the environment and know how they can do something to help make the planet more environmentally friendly.

6.       Classification or division: Division because I’m breaking up the topic of the environment into different parts.

7.       Potential categories: Pollution, harm to people animals, how damaging the environment affects our daily lives, how to help clean up the environment, positive effects that a clean environment has had in the past, little tasks that people can do daily to help reduce damage to the environment.

8.       Examples: Under the pollution category, some examples would be pollution of water and land, what causes pollution, and how we can limit it.  I would give examples of factories (run-off) and recycling.

9.       Techniques: History: I can give the history of pollution and how it has shaped our planet, Definition: define pollution, Compare and Contrast: an environment with/without pollution and the benefits of a clean environment, and Listing: listing different sources of pollution, types of pollution, and ways we can help.

10.   Potential problems: I will need to research the examples so that I can be more specific.

Catchy Introductions

In my original introduction, I attempted to set the scene and introduce one of the main characters.  I wanted the reader to know the date, time, and also where the main character, Jenny, worked.  These facts that I listed in the introduction give the reader an idea of where the story is going.

It was a Tuesday morning at 8:15, and Jenny was walking to work.  She works on the 11th floor of 1 World Trade at the Bank of America.  Like every other morning before work, Jenny stopped at the same Starbucks on Broadway and ordered her usual coffee.  She was friends with a woman who workled there, Sylvia, and started talking with her as her coffee was being made. 

New introduction techniques:

1- Statistic
"The impact left a gaping, burning hole near the 80th floor of the 110-story skyscraper, instantly killing hundreds of people and trapping hundreds more in higher floors."  9/11 was a devistating day in history.  The attacks killed thousands of innocent people.  No one was expecting anything to happen, including a woman named Jenny who was on her way to work the morning of the attacks. 

2- Before-and-after scenario
Jenny stopped at Starbucks on Broadway like every other weekday and ordered her usual coffee.  It was a Tuesday morning around 8:15 and the day seemed like it was going to have its normal flow of events.  Jenny had no idea what was going to happen later that day and how it was going to affect the lives of many people that she cared about.     

3- Quotation
"Treasure every moment that you have."  Jenny has this quote posted her door and sees it every time she leaves her apartment.  It was a Tuesday morning on September 11th, and the days events unfolded this quote continued to pop back up in the back of her mind.

Showing and Telling

Pure Narration:
The line kept getting shorter and shorter as people were going into the haunted house, and my heart began beating faster and faster.  You couldn't see into the house because a curtain was covering the entrance, but you could hear the screams, the vibrating floor, and the air cannons.  At that moment I could not believe that I was going back into this haunted house after the terrifying experience that I had two years before, but I thought that I wouldn’t be as scared because I was with my friends.  I also had a mindset going in that everything was fake and everyone was just an actor or actress, but once I entered the haunted house, this went away and all I could think about was getting through as fast as possible. 

The first thing I saw when I went in was flashing lights breaking through the thick, black darkness.  All of a sudden a man scared us from behind and made run forward into the next trap.  The floor started vibrating vigorously and I jumped about five feet in the air and screamed.  After sprinting through half of the house we got to a room with 8 white doors painted with red question marks.  All of the doors were locked and we thought that we had gone the wrong way.  After what seemed like 2 or 3 minutes, one of the doors started to slowly open.  The brave person in our group went towards it and swung it open.  A man with a really scary mask screamed and we started running down the hallway, not able to see anything through the darkness.  We got to a part of the haunted house that brought us outside, and everyone was able to catch up to each other and catch their breath.  After walking back into the house and thinking that it was over, I heard a loud chain saw turn on.  Everything after that was pandemonium.  Everyone was being shoved down the tight hallways and I was trying my best to stick with the group and not get left behind.  One of my friends lost her shoe, but it was timed perfectly because we were all stopped at that moment anyways, not wanting to turn down the next dark hallway and see what was awaiting us around the corner.  We finally worked our way to the end after about a minute, and I was so relieved to be out of there.  When we got out we were able to laugh about it, but I probably won't be going to a haunted house again any time soon!


Pure Scene:
"I can't believe I came here again!" I said to my friends.  "It was so scary last time.  I don't know if I can handle it."
"Don't worry about it!" one of my friends said trying to reassure me.  "You're here with your friends."
"Ok, only three people can go in at a time," the lady announced who was taking our tickets.
"Brandon and Kyra, you guys go in first since you aren't scared.  I'll go with Tanya and Sara next."
"Ok you can go in now," the worker told us.

"Guys, I don't like this..."
"Ahh!" we all screamed, running away from one of the actors.
"Go, go!  Just keep going!"
"They're not real, don't worry."
"Ahh! Get away from me!"

(basically a complete repeat of those last 5 lines with the addition of "Tanya!  Did you lose your shoe?!")

"Wow, I'm so glad that's over."
"Never doing that again!"
"I wonder if everyone outside could hear me screaming?"


Narration and Scene:
The line kept getting shorter and shorter as people were filing into the haunted house, and my heart kept beating faster and faster.
"I can't believe I came here again!" I said to one of my friends.  "It was so scary last time.  I don't know if I can handle it."
"Don't worry about it!" one of my friends said trying to reassure me.  "You're here with your friends."
I could hear the screams, the vibrating floor, and the air cannons going off inside, and I was hoping that it would go by really quickly.
The first thing I saw when I went in was flashing lights breaking through the thick, black darkness.  All of a sudden a man scared us from behind and made run forward into the next trap.  The floor started vibrating vigorously and I jumped about five feet in the air.  Everyone was screaming and running through the halls as fast as possible.  We walked into a room about half way through that had 8 white doors painted with red question marks.  All of the doors were locked and we thought that we had gone the wrong way.
"Are we in the wrong room?" one of my friends asked.
"Maybe we were supposed to follow the other arrow."
After what seemed like 2 or 3 minutes, one of the doors started to slowly open.  The brave person in our group went towards it and swung it open.  A man with a really scary mask screamed and we started running down the hallway, not able to see anything through the darkness.
We got to a part of the haunted house that brought us outside, and everyone was able to catch up to each other and catch their breath.  After walking back into the house and thinking that it was over, I heard a loud chain saw turn on.  Everything after that was pandemonium.  Everyone was being shoved down the tight hallways and I was trying my best to stick with the group and not get left behind.  Once we heard the chain saw noise going back in the other direction, we all slowed down and stopped.  Partly because no one wanted to turn down the next dark hallway and see what was awaiting us around the corner, but also because Tanya had to find her shoe and put it back on.  Luckily, we were close to the exit and were finally able to leave.
"I'm so glad that's over!"
"I'm never going back in there again."
"Do you think everyone waiting in line could hear me screaming?"
We were able to laugh about it afterwards, but I'm sure none of us will be going to a haunted house again any time soon!

Hi! My name is Sara and I'm taking College Composition this year!  I play 1st doubles on the Varsity Tennis Team and also play the violin, piano, and sing.  I am in the Select Women's Choir and Jazz Choir at school and also play the violin in the RPYO.  I want to continue playing both the violin and tennis in college.  I love math and science and hope to study optics in college!  My brother is 20 years old and wants to study animation at RIT after graduating from MCC.  The purpose of this writing blog is to share writing with others and hopefully get feedback that will help me improve.  I think that writing is a great way to express yourself and bring out your inner voice.  I love writing about topics that are interesting to me and easy to form an opinion about.  I'm looking forward to this class and hope that it will help me develop usefull skills for writing in college. :)